Day 33: Emotional regulation
isra.a.writes • 29 Jun 2025 •
You’re in a good mood until someone infiltrates your peace with their persistent nonsense banter, wilful ignorance, or triggering comments. In these all-too-common instances, you need to be able to control your emotions- for your own sake.
Emotional regulation is a top-tier skill, but mastering it without fault is nearly impossible. It comes with its own set of challenges.
Emotional regulation is difficult when:
- You are dealing with someone you have to over-explain to
- Your boundaries are being tested
- Your boundaries are being crossed
- You are having a bad day
- You feel deeply misunderstood
- Someone you love is being attacked
Some challenges exist for good reason. For example, you want to be more defensive and assertive when your boundaries are being compromised. It is no time to be mindful, calm and collected. But the good thing is that emotional regulation isn’t just about being calm.
There are other less-encouraged (though incredibly helpful) ways to emotionally regulate, such as:
- Distracting yourself from the problem (this one gets a bad rep because ‘avoidance is bad’, but that’s not always true).
- Leaving the conversation abruptly (might seem rude, but often necessary if you feel yourself riling up)
Ultimately, you must do what you feel is necessary to regulate your emotions. Don’t worry about people-pleasing during a heightened emotional situation. Give yourself grace to deal with your emotions privately. You deserve to protect the peace you cultivated before your calmness was put to a brutal test.
Comments
@therealbrandonwilson beyond useful and practical. Thank you!
You may find this process helpful for releasing emotional triggers: https://daveasprey.com/how-i-release-emotional-triggers-the-5-step-reset-process/