Just a phase

tao  •  14 Sept 2021

I feel as if I am coming out of my “funk” today.

When I feel down, every act I take feels like a marathon.
Every decision, every thought, every emotion.
It all just feels such hard work.

My wife suggests we do something and my chest drops with a heavy feeling.
I remember that I need to do the washing and the energy it takes me to collect the clothes and put them in the washing machine is enough to wipe me out for the rest of the day.
I am surly, quiet, anxious and morose.
The thoughts of all the things I could or should be doing are a weight on my brain.

But, I can keep on functioning.

I don’t fit the stereotype of a depressed person at all.

Some people might look at me and think I am normal.

I can even crack jokes, be friendly, get things done and be the proper family man I am supposed to be.

But on those bad days, inside, I feel like I am about to die under the weight of it all.

But I am emerging into blue skies again.

Maybe I was just tired?
Maybe I was just going through a phase?

Comments

Great to hear you’re getting better, @tao. It’s real each time it hits, but it’ll pass indeed.

jasonleow  •  15 Sept 2021, 2:31 am