Sylvia's figs

There’s a heartbreaking quote in Sylvia Plath’s only novel. In it she compares her life to a fig tree with every fig representing a possible future. In this image she can’t decide which bright future to pick, and she dies watching each fig wither in turn.

Today I’m thinking about assessing commitments. I’ve made a commitment to start writing on a schedule this year, so I need to work that into my life. I’m committing my time to writing.

But even in this one domain, I need to choose a direction. I’m a bit of an idea factory. And because of this I need to learn how to work fast.

Right now, that is my direction: Learn to write at the fastest pace I can while still producing good work. But even knowing this direction, I still need to choose which stories to work on.

Each fig is full of seeds – maybe that is what Sylvia’s vision missed. She saw each future as something that would consume her life. But in truth, each commitment is a seed we’re planting. We only have time and space in our life to cultivate maybe one tree, or a small orchard. Looking at it this way, I won’t really know what the seed will become until I plant it and make a commitment to tend that little plot of land.