Do you love yourself?
haideralmosawi • 15 Mar 2025 •
One of the most profound realizations of my life was making the distinction between loving myself right now vs placing conditions in order to love myself. Personal development and striving to achieve the life we want aren’t necessarily motivated by life. They can be motivated by insecurity and shame. We don’t consider ourselves worthy of love yet. We must first earn our love before we can truly love ourselves.
Are we financially successful enough? No? Then we don’t deserve love!
Are we popular? No? Then we don’t deserve love!
Do we have other people who love us? MAYBE!? Then we don’t deserve our own love!
This conditional attitude to love makes us live in a constant state of insecurity and stress. What’s worse, when we don’t immediately achieve the success we want, we don’t support ourselves through the challenges. We shame ourselves. We kick ourselves down when we need our love and support the most.
I believe in unconditional love towards ourselves, starting now. No conditions. No milestones to achieve first. We don’t have to be successful or become the person we aspire to be to love ourselves. We don’t love ourselves when we reach our destination. We love ourselves throughout the entire journey.
What’s your relationship to yourself like? Do you love yourself now or have you placed conditions on yourself before you can love yourself?
Comments
@haideralmosawi Good post! I struggle with this a bit. I think it underlies much of my ambition and drive. Been working on this a lot but long way to go.
@therealbrandonwilson Ooh I’m sooo gonna try that! Fascinating!
@therealbrandonwilson Thanks for sharing! I’m going to try this soon!
@jasonleow Many people cling to the self-hate because they think that’s what motivates them and fuels their success. But I would rather be motivated with the clean fuel of love, enthusiasm, and curiosity.
@haideralmosawi Re: self-hate - deep indeed. Something to meditate on
Here’s a simple test to determine whether you love yourself. Stand facing north. Close your eyes and tune into your heart space. Say, “Yes” and you should notice yourself fall forward. Say, “No” and you should notice yourself fall backward. This is the subconscious answering for you. Now say, “I love myself” and see what happens.