Life breaks you after 40

I wrote about how life begins after 40 yesterday. A bit of radical optimism never hurt…

But it’s also true that life breaks you after 40.

You’re the sandwiched generation. Elderly parents to care for one hand, young kids on the other. Everyone depends on you. No one’s coming to help you. Kids need your attention, presence, care, nurturing. Elders need your guidance, your care-giving, your financial support. You work all week, sometimes weekends. All the while, you feel your energy slowly going down, even while you’re expected to work harder than ever.

Chronic health ailments start popping out of nowhere. You can diet and exercise all you want but you lose not weight but motivation, and eventually self-esteem. You want to get to financial freedom—you see the importance of it now, for the family—but the flesh is weak, time is lacking. You have no room for entertainment, hobbies, friends, sometimes even family. You’re burned out, desperately in need of a long long vacation, yet you don’t even dare to stop, in case the money stops.

The hard things peak.
The good things, bottomout.

No wonder they call it the “midlife squeeze”.

And you’re just trying to piece them together.
Feigning they fit.
Hoping they hold.

Life begins after 40, yes.
But life breaks you, too.
A bit of objective reality never hurt…