Self care as a skill

In skill development, you know you’ve got it when it goes from conscious competence to unconscious competence. Meaning, what started with having to be very intentional and having to think before you perform the skill now becomes more natural, intuitve and free-flowing.

I think it’s the same with self care.

I’ve always been disembodied and careless with what my body needs, until it becomes too late. So exercising self care had been challenging, because it feels unnatural and requires a lot of conscious effort to even start. Making plans and declarations to rest, traveling to Bali at the end of the year, or even setting daily reminders on my phone.

I never had the intrinsic motivation to self care well.

But lately, self care is becoming more free flowing, more intuitive. If it’s cold, I wear socks at home instead of bearing with it. If it’s late, so I go to sleep instead of scrolling the phone or working late. I might not need a afternoon power nap but go anyway to rest. No plans, no intention-setting, no goals, no reminders.

Just doing what needed, what my body is whispering.
Being at peace and one with it.

No longer fighting it.

I think I’ve finally learned to rest, not just stop.